Relationships and Intimacy during Quarantine

Good morning dear ones

Lockdown, quarantine, what experiences we are having, right? Guys, we were forced to look inside, outside, up and down… everywhere and I hope that also from different angles. And my curiosity is how are the relationships? How's it going for you? Staying with yourself, with your family, children, husband, partner, boyfriend? It is in relationships where we grow the most. It is so interesting that they are the closest ones who press our buttons and we certainly press theirs too.

Before Covid, the average time TOGETHER with your daily companion was 2 ½ hours. Now it's being 15hrs, daily. Although it is challenging, look at the opportunity we are having to work on these relationships. Tell me, how has it been for you?

In today's world, with so many demands, Love has also become another task to be done in order to achieve conjugal perfection.

In the book "Laços e Nós" by Beatriz Helena Paranhos Cardella, she reminds us that where there are no differences there is no relationship. We are not perceived or respected. I know the book is in Portuguese, but I wants to share my studies with you. The poet Octavio Paz draws our attention to the fact that the “the other is always a mystery and, at the same time, welcoming, and  the meeting is adventure and warmth, hospitality and displacement.”

To "talk about love" and intimacy, it is necessary to work on the ability to be with the other's difficulty and with yours too, especially in a time of extreme loneliness and individualism. We have an enormous capacity to achieve full love as well as to remain in suffering on the battlefield. Relationships can be healing.

Intimacy is not ready, it is built. When it is worked, you find possibilities for meeting with others and with yourself. Then ask your self:

What is intimacy for you?

How much time do you dedicate to your relationship?

What level of intimacy do you have with your partner?

In therapy you learn to manage moments of crisis, and it is there that the couple finds the chance for transformation or even to observe their needs and needs, that they need more time to get to know each other.

With love,

Lucia Gardiner